Monthly Archives: August 2011

Long Time, No See


Ok.  I admit it.  I dropped the ball.


It has been a while since you heard from me.


You probably hadn’t noticed.


What have I been doing?   Umm.  I don’t exactly know.  I mean, I’ve been conscious most of the time, and I haven’t suffered any sort of blow to the head or trauma induced amnesia or anything.  But I still can’t really come up with a super compelling list of really obvious achievements that have kept me from my newish blogging endeavor.  Nor can I even come up with an uncompelling list.


I’ve just been busy.


Right this moment, I feel the way you do when you are a stay at home mom (which I am) and people who have known you to work in the past  say things like “Now what do you do with all of your time?”  or “What have you found to keep yourself busy?”


I just love when people say stuff like this to me.


Especially older people.  For some reason, older people say this a lot.


And people who don’t have kids.  Maybe the old people who say these things are just far enough away from having kids that they don’t remember what it was like when they were raising them.  The people who don’t have kids just don’t have any idea.


They don’t know the secret.


Kids are black holes.  They can suck in all of the energy around them and it just disappears.  They can rip a hole in the time/space continuum.  They can bring matter and anti-matter together which can cause an explosion that endangers the very existence of the universe.  You know, all that stuff that happened on Star Trek.


I’m no Carl Sagen.  But I know this is true.


Luckily, kids only have this impact on their own parents.


It isn’t just the kids, though.  It is everything that comes with them.  It is the soccer practices and the batting lessons and the homework and the school paperwork and the grown out clothes and the new clothes they need and the stories they want to tell you and the stories they don’t want to tell you and the playdates and the heart breaks and the pierced ears and the new bikes and the name calling and the squabbling and the tattling and the messy rooms and the picked up rooms and the school lunches and the forgotten PE clothes and the achievements and the failures…


I had better stop.  That sentence is a run on.


It also might, in itself, cause a rip in the time/space continuum.


Oh, wait.  It already has.  Suddenly it is time  to go pick up my daughter from school.


To be continued …


… in  Long Time, No See II, wherein I describe why it is absolutely worth every moment of intergalactic instability because having kids is the best thing on earth.


For Richer, For…Richer.


I have a lot going on this weekend.  My stepson is going back to college.  My other son has baseball practice.  I am going to see The Help with the girls.  I’m pretty busy.

That’s why I can’t make it to the Kim Kardashian/Kris Humphries wedding on Saturday.  The American Royal Wedding.


Well, that and the fact that I wasn’t invited.

It’s too bad, really.  Imagine what the favors will be like.

When the bride has a $2 million, 20.5 carat engagement ring, they have to at least give the wedding guests a cute little Prius or a pony or something.  Or maybe a pair of Louboutins each.  All bearing the initials of the bride and groom, of course.  I hate to miss that.

I really may be in the minority, though.  It sounds like almost everyone is invited.    Ryan Seacrest and Kathy Lee are both invited and going, as are Lara Spencer from Good Morning America and Katie Couric.  Kelly Ripa and The Donald are invited, but not  going.  Tareq and Michaele Salahi, the White House party crashers are not invited, but purportedly are going anyway.

That’s ok.  I really have been looking forward to seeing The Help.

Kidding aside, however, there is something deeply distasteful about this over-the-top display of conspicuous consumption.  This is especially true at this moment in time that can be described, at very least, as economically uncertain.  Let’s just say I have friends and acquaintances who have quite literally lost their homes and spend sleepless nights worrying about how they will make it through the month. This storyline is repeated all over the country.  Millions on a party for two people?  Just doesn’t seem right.

Sure, every bride dreams of the beautiful ring, the gorgeous dress and the great party.  And, sure, most of us spend more on that particular party than reason and practicality support.  But it is estimated that this wedding (Kim’s second, by the way) will top $10 million.  Ten million dollars.  $10,000,000.  Holy crap.

That’s at least $12 million, between the ring and the wedding.  I decided to look at $12 million.  How long would it take the average person (who actually does something valuable for a living, say) to earn $12 million in salary?

  • If you made $50,000 a year (as a teacher, for example), it would take you 240 YEARS to earn $12 million.  Only 40 of those years would be spent earning the $2 million that Kim’s ring cost.
  • If you doubled your salary and made $100,000 a year, it would only take you 120 YEARS to earn $12 million.  20 years for the ring.
  • If you doubled your salary again and made $200,000 a year, it would only take you 60 YEARS to earn $12 million.  Only 10 years for the ring.
  • If you had a job making $12 an hour and worked 40 hours a week, 52 weeks a year, it would take you just over 480 and 3/4 YEARS to earn $12 million.  Only 80 of those years would be spent to buy the ring.

This would all be before you paid taxes and social security etc.  And of course, you couldn’t spend a single penny.  For 480 years.

I hope they have fun.

I have nothing against Kim Kardashian.  She is clearly quite beautiful.  And famous.  Famous for …what?  Famous for being on tv, for having a graphic “leaked” sex tape, for posing nude in Playboy, for being on Dancing with the Stars, for suing an actress who has the nerve to resemble her, for having a big butt.

Oh, I see.  She is famous for being famous.  And now, because of her extravagant wedding (which will no doubt be the subject of some sort of television special and countless magazine spreads), the American Royal Wedding, for Pete’s sake, she will be even MORE FAMOUS.

And with fame comes … more money.

So by spending the equivalent of the gross national product of a small country on a second wedding (resulting in a marriage that, statistically speaking, doesn’t have a ghost of a chance of lasting more than five years), Kim and Kris (don’t get me started about professional athletes) will become even richer.

The worst part of the whole thing, though, is this:  WE MAKE IT ALL HAPPEN.  We create the false celebrity because we simply cannot look away.  We cannot help being manipulated by the reality tv producers who package their “stars” and script their “lives” so that they do things and face situations that we are drawn to, like junkies drawn to heroin.

The very worst part?  I am as guilty, if not more, than anyone.  I eat it all up and ask for seconds.  I talk about “what idiots” these reality stars are, and how tacky, and how dysfunctional.  What complete losers!  Thank goodness I know what is really important in life!   Aren’t I lucky to live a normal life and to have my priorities straight?  Aren’t I just soooo much better than them?  Then I set the DVR to record the next episode.

By the way, I have a big butt.  It’s never earned me a dime.


That’s Why It’s Called A Reservation


I’m mad.  That might be too strong.  I’m frustrated.  Not strong enough.  I’m pissed.

That’s it.

Let me share the source of my frustration.  (Maybe that was right after all — saying “let me share the source of my piss” just doesn’t sound right.)

I decided I wanted to buy a reasonably priced (that is for my husband), small (also for my husband) chest to put  on the landing at the top of our stairs.  I had been looking for one for some time, but hadn’t found one that was just right.  Then, the other day, there it was,  in the window of a nationally known retailer that shall remain nameless.  Oh, all right.  I know you really want to know.  It was Pier One.

The chest is perfect.  Right size, right price, right color.  I even like it.  Dare I say it?  I actually think I am in love!

Anyway, there I am, dream chest before me.  Of course, I have the kids with me and I am driving my convertible VW Beetle.  Not the time or circumstance in which to buy a chest, a dream one or not.

I have come across this dream chest a few days before my kids go back to school.  I am occupied with other things.  I do not manage to get my chest for a few days.

School starts.  Yeah!  I have time to  discover that Pier One (since we are naming names) has a wonderful and handy new program whereby you can pick out things online (say, for example, your dream chest) and then pick them up in the store.  How miraculous!

What do you know?  There is my lovely dream chest online, and, of the stores in my area, there is only one that has it in stock.  And it is at the store nearest me!  Hallelujah!  And, dream of all dreams, it has gone on clearance!  Further price reduction!  I reserve my own special dream chest.  We are meant for each other and I am happy.

Now, a few logistical issues arise.  I still cannot pick up my chest in my Buggie.  We also have a Suburban, but one of my college-age stepsons calls, and he has need of  it.  He must be put off, however, because I need it to pick up my dream chest.

The second day of school, the sun rises and I awake, anticipating the perfection that will be my landing, once I have my chest of dreams.  Every time I walk by its spot, I picture it there, and think about how happy we will be together.

I clear out the Suburban (because its main purpose is to serve as supplementary storage), and I am off to Pier One, all anticipation and exhilaration.

It is like the predictable plot of the Victorian melodrama.  I don’t need to recount every step.  You already know what I find when I get to the store.

They have already sold my dream chest to another.

But really, they assure me, I did not want that one.  It was scratched and damaged, and I am far better off to be without it.  It would have only brought me grief and pain.

They can, however, introduce me to a new dream.  And they will use their new online system to put it on hold for me.  In Fremont.  Which is 45 minutes away.

I will let you know how that one turns out.   But I am no longer in love.



Anticipation, Part Deux


I said the list wasn’t all-inclusive.  I couldn’t sleep last night because I kept thinking of other things I was eagerly anticipating.  Please note, there is a high degree of certitude  that some of these things will not live up to their potential.  That is why I must enjoy the anticipation while is lasts.

“As Daddy said, life is 95% anticipation.”
Gloria Swanson

More things I am looking forward to with great anticipation:

  • Two and 1/2 Men 

I have not been a regular follower of this show, but what person on the planet didn’t watch Charlie Sheen’s more than public psychotic break from reality.  Now they have to kill him off on the show and replace him with Ashton Kutcher.  Kutcher definitely has the comedic chops (and fan base) to more than replace Sheen.  And like a train wreck, one just cannot look away from the whole debacle.  I’m not sure how this one will turn out, but two things are certain.  It won’t go well for someone, and Charlie Sheen will have something to say about it.  The new season premieres on Monday, September 19.

  • Glee


I admit it.  I am a big-time Gleek.  It really is the most fun show around.  Sarcasm and musical theater.  It is a brilliant combination.  Then when you factor in the best list of guest stars on TV plus the all to familiar angst of high school, well, it is irresistible.   This season, some of the original students move along, and new ones join the cast.  This is a great way to keep things fresh.  Thank goodness for tenure, though.  Sue Sylvester won’t be going anywhere.  The third season premieres on Tuesday, September 20.

  • Boardwalk Empire 

This HBO series starts its second season on September 25.  If you haven’t seen it, watch the first season first.  Steve Buscemi, a favorite of mine since his Fargo days, stars as Enoch “Nuchy” Johnson.  Johnson was a real-life powerful political figure in Prohibition Era Atlantic City.  You really want to see Nuchy’s character unfold.

 The first episode of the first season of this rich and complicated series was directed by Martin Scorsese, and he continues as an executive producer, along with several of the minds behind The Sopranos.  You can really see and feel the contributions from these corners throughout the series.  Think a cross between Gangs of New York, the Godfather and The Sopranos.  Nuchy, not unlike Tony Soprano, is a complicated and endlessly interesting character and Buscemi was born to play him.

The series is set in a fascinating period of our history, and throughout you see the effects of Prohibition on the rise of organized crime.  I especially enjoy seeing appearances made by real life characters like Al Capone and Lucky Luciano, but at periods in their lives that we know less about.  Don’t miss this one.

  • I Don’t Know How She Does It 

This movie is based upon a novel of the same name by Allison Pearson.  I really enjoyed the novel, especially as I read it while I was still juggling a law practice and a family with small kids.  The movie stars Sarah Jessica Parker as a successful power mom who struggles to balance it all.

The buzz is that SJP plays Carrie Bradshaw, working mother.  I like Carrie.  I loved Sex in the City (the series).  Carrie on film has been more problematic, however.  And SJP on film — don’t get me started.  This may be one of those that I don’t like because it doesn’t meet its potential.  Or I could just love it because SJP wears cute shoes.  It opens in limited release on September 16.

  • The Way

This film was directed by Emilio Estevez and stars his father,  Martin Sheen.  Sheen plays a California doctor who travels to France due to the death of his son while hiking The Way Of St. James, a traditional course of pilgrimage through the French and Spanish Pyrenees.  Driven by his grief and desire to connect with his dead son, Sheen’s character undertakes the pilgrimage himself.  Along the way, he encounters other pilgrims with other motivations.

Ok, this film is either really boring, or just incredible.  Martin Sheen is a talented actor, but can at times be a bit self-indulgent.  Either way, I am really looking forward to breathtaking scenery of France and Spain.  The Way opens on October 7.

  • The Ides Of March

Also opening on October 7,  in limited release, is this political thriller, directed by George Clooney.  Clooney also stars.  My explanation could stop right there, but listen to the rest of this cast: Ryan Gosling, Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Paul Giamatti, Marisa Tomei, Evan Rachel Wood.  I just don’t know how this film can go wrong.  I will watch almost any movie in which either Hoffman or Giamatti appear, just to see them.  The plot involves a young communications director (Gosling) for a presidential candidate (Clooney) that comes across information that might compromise the candidate’s campaign.  The film is based upon a play by Beau Willimon.

  • J. Edgar

Clint Eastwood directs this film about long time director of the FBI, J. Edgar Hoover.  Leonardo DiCaprio stars as Hoover, one of the most intriguing characters in modern US history.  Hoover was the first director of the FBI and remained in that position for nearly 40 years.  Hoover is now notorious for his willingness to use his power to target those he saw as dissenters, often bending the law over backwards in the process.  His private life has also been the source of much speculation, both due to his likely homosexuality, as well as titillating rumors that he was a cross-dresser, among other things.  There is already Oscar buzz surrounding DiCaprio’s turn in this juicy historical role.

Judi Dench also appears as Hoover’s over protective mother, Anne Marie.  She also makes every film  she appears in worth watching.

J. Edgar opens on November 9.

Well, these should keep me busy.  Oh, and I haven’s even made it to December yet!  Do I sense an “Anticipation, Part Trois” coming on?  You bet!

In the meantime, I would like to hear what YOU are anticipating in the entertainment arena.   I would like to have other suggestions in mind, just in case everything I am looking forward to turns out to suck.

And I would really like to know what Gloria Swanson was doing the other 5% of the time.




Remember that commercial for Heinz ketchup?  An-ti-ci-pa-a-tion.    Sometimes I think the best time is when you are looking forward to something you think will be great.

This is a list of things I am looking forward to, with great an-ti-ci–pa-a-tion;

  • Katy Perry Concert

My daughter and I are going to see Katy Perry.  We are going because my daughter loves Katy Perry.

The secret is that I also love Katy Perry.  This may be inappropriate for my age.

The concert may also be inappropriate for my daughter’s age.  I plan to hum loudly in my daughter’s ear to drown out all questionable lyrics. (Who am I kidding?  She knows most of them by heart already.  Mercifully, she does not understand them yet.)  I also plan to distract her by pointing out things about back-up dancers (“Look how cute her shoes are!”) in case Katy does anything inappropriate on stage.

I’m not sure what my daughter will do to address my age inappropriateness.  Probably she will tell me to sit down and stop dancing.

  • The Help

I LOVED this book.  I am hoping to LOVE this movie.  Not only is it about an incredibly important time of change in this country, but it also has a red-headed heroine.  I am exceedingly fond of a red-headed heroine.

The Help opened August 10, and I already have my GNO to see it on tap.

  • One Day

This feature film, which is tag-lined as “Twenty Years, Two People, One Day”, opens August 19.  The film is based upon a novel of the same name and stars Anne Hathaway and Jim Sturgess.

I haven’t read the book, and don’t know too much about the film other than what I have seen in the trailers, but I am looking forward to it for several reasons.  They are:

1.  It takes place in England.  Usually this alone is enough to make a film worthwhile for me.

2.  It is one of those “same people through the years” movies.  I have reached a point in life where these are nearly always relatable because I have usually been through all of the stages already.

3.  It stars Jim Surgess.   He was in the Other Bolyen Girl and Across the Universe, two admittedly sub-par movies, but I found him strangely compelling as Jude.

4.  It is directed by Lone Sherfig, who directed An Education, a film I really love.  I must not have been alone, because that film was nominated for a Best Picture Oscar a few years ago.  If you haven’t seen An Education, go find it.  Carey Mulligan delivers a wonderful performance.  I may have also loved An Education because of the script by Nick Hornby.  I have yet to come across anything he has done with which I haven’t felt connected.  But I digress…back to the list.

5.  The soundtrack includes new music by Elvis Costello and the Imposters.  Elvis and I go way back.  In fact, I am wearing my Goodbye Cruel World tour t-shirt as I write this.  Well, not really, but I could be, because I do own one and still sleep in it every so often when I am feeling particularly sexy.  Anyway, any new Elvis, especially plus The Imposters, is a big plus plus (have I said “plus” enough?).

  • Modern Family

I enjoy my time with the Dunphy’s and the Prichett’s every Wednesday, even in reruns, but I am ready for more.  I don’t know anyone who doesn’t share my love for this family! I love Gloria, Phil, Jay, Cam, and Manny.  I love them all!  Well, we can all get more soon — the new season premieres on September 21.

  • Dexter

The new season of Dexter begins airing on Showtime on October 2.  I can hardly wait to see what Dexter gets up to next.  I am completely addicted to this mix of horror and comedy, involving a serial killer/blood spatter expert with a strict moral code.  There is really nothing else like it.  Also, for some reason I really enjoy watching real-life  soon to be ex-husband and wife Michael C. Hall and Jennifer Carpenter play brother and sister on-screen.  How complicated is that relationship?

  • Anonymous

I had never heard of this movie until I saw the poster in a theater lobby the other day.  Does my interest really need to be explained?  If so, let me just add that this film stars Vanessa Redgrave as Queen Elizabeth, Joely Richardson as Young Queen Elizabeth, and Rhys Ifans as the Earl of Oxford.    And the website includes phrases like “The Virgin Queen” and “the Privy Council.”  This is about all it takes for me.  This film opens October 28.

  • MadMen

This probably needs no explanation either.  Don Draper.  The Sixties.  A kid named Sally.  Cocktails.  Cool clothes.  It is new and old at the same time.  You don’t know where it is going.

But you’ve been there, from a different vantage.  My parents’ kitchen looked just like Betty Draper’s.  Ok, that won’t be in the new season.  God knows what year it will be.  But that is part of the an-ti-ci-pa-a-tion.  And who knows, maybe Sterling, Cooper, Draper & Pryce will get the Heinz account.

The new season is currently set to start airing in March 2012.

This is not an all-inclusive list, by any means.  These are just the things I keep thinking about.  That anticipation.  It’s makin’ me wait, it’s keepin’ me wa-a-a-it-in’.

I really hope it doesn’t all stink.


You Know What Happens When You Are 12


Today, my son picks up his class schedule for 7th grade.  Seventh grade.  Grade 7.

No, it doesn’t matter how I say it.  Every which way, it makes me feel a little bit ill.

I was in 7th Grade the year I was 12.  I have a summer birthday, so I was 12 that whole year.

It was quite a year.

I have said it before.  I think everyone has a certain age in their life that they remember with greater clarity than others.  For me, it was 12.  Is it the same for everyone, or was this just a particularly momentous, transformative year for me?

I don’t know.  I just know it makes me shudder to think that my son may be facing some of the same transformations this year.  Feeling a bit ill again.

This is a list of some of the things that happened to me when I was 12.
  • I was allowed to read anything I wanted in the library.

Back then, I was exposed to much less by the age of 12. Obviously, we didn’t have the internet or cable.  In my hometown, we got three tv stations.  On really clear days, we got a fourth — the public television station.   But we did have access to a library.  Well, at least if we drove to the next town over we did.

When I turned 12, my mom said I could start checking out anything I wanted, without limitation.  Anything.   And I read it all.    I regularly checked out Harold Robbins with my Nancy Drew.  I read The Exorcist.  I read Judy Blume’s Forever.  I read bodice rippers and War & Peace (at least I started it).  I read The Fountainhead. I read the Life Cycle Library.  I didn’t understand it all, but suddenly, I saw the world as a MUCH more complicated (and interesting) place.

  • I had my first real boyfriend.

I grew up in a really small town.  We started having boyfriends and girlfriends in kindergarten.  It was just what you did.  I pretty much always had a boyfriend, but it really didn’t mean much.  Until I was 12.   Then the kissing began.  And the hanging out at each other’s lockers.  And the holding hands in the hallway.  And the going to the movies.  This was a REAL boyfriend.  Well, sort of.

  • I discovered the joys and agonies of the French kiss.

When we were 12, my friends started to have “make-out parties.”   Despite the name, they were really quite tame.  They usually involved someone’s barn or garage.  The lights were low.  People were paired off, and there was lots of giggling, but not really much else.  Just kissing.

The party usually ended at about 9 pm.  We were only 12, after all.  The rest of the time, all anyone ever talked about is if you had “Frenched” at one of these get-togethers.  The regular kissing was quite a sloppy, clumsy affair, so you can imagine what “Frenching” might be like.  Yuck.  We were all repulsed and attracted to the idea at the same time.  My boyfriend was on the shy side, so we did not leap into this, but I explained the whole idea to him.  After all, I could read everything in the library.  Anyway, we finally gingerly crossed the “Frenching” threshold. Phew.  Now we could tell people that we had done it!  And, we decided, France must be a strange and wonderful place.  But we were not quite ready to go live there yet.

  • I started to babysit.

For the first time, I had to be responsible for someone who was more helpless than me, and this charge was not always cooperative.  Taking care of someone else was hard!   For the very first time (but not the last by a long shot) I started to see my mother’s life from her perspective.  Well, just a glimmer of understanding.  I was, after all, still a 12-year-old girl.

  • I got my ears pierced.

This was a big deal.  I had just assumed that you had to be an adult to do something permanent like this.  It was a long time ago, before the days when your server at Olive Garden might have a pierced tongue.  I hadn’t even started to ask.   One day, my mom and I were at Meijer’s Thrifty Acres (that is what is used to be called) and they were piercing people’s ears in the jewelry department.  My mom said “You want to do it?” I said “Yes!” and we both took the plunge.  Together.  And it was permanent.   I felt very grown up.

  • I got my period.

 When I was younger, my cousin said to me “You know what happens when you are 12, right?”  Of course I said “yes,” but I really had no idea what she was talking about.  But she did give me the expectation that, on my 12th birthday, something pretty momentous would happen.  Later, my mom cleared up the mystery and explained that it doesn’t necessarily happen when you are 12.

But, like clockwork, half way through my twelfth year, there I was, locked in the bathroom, screaming for my mom while my brothers pounded on the door to get in to get ready for school.  I had to start carrying a purse.  That was the tell-tale sign.  Oh, and my mom took me out to lunch and celebrated by having a bloody mary.  For the first time, I really felt like joining her.

  • I started wearing a bra.

This was also traumatic.  It was at that stage where it was hard to know what was more embarrassing — wearing one, or not wearing one.  And they weren’t like they are now.  They weren’t cute, or really in any way designed for a middle school girl.   They were industrial and terrifying.

To make it worse, when we were buying my first bra, my mom made me try it on over my clothes in the middle of the aforementioned Meijer.  For those who don’t know, Meijer is sort of a midwestern Target or Walmart, carrying everything known to man.  The perfect place to run in to people you know.  While you are wearing a bra over your clothes.  I don’t think she realized that her unwillingness to take the time to wait for a fitting room resulted in an experience that has scarred me for life.

  • My family moved from Michigan to California.

I had lived my whole life assuming that I would live and die in my home town.  Until one day my dad came home from work and said “How would you like to live in California?”  What?  Like the Beverly Hillbillies?  Who wouldn’t?  Well, we didn’t move to Beverly Hills.  We moved to Fresno.  But we did have a cee-ment pond.

Beyond that, my horizons opened dramatically.  Suddenly, I saw a world beyond my small town, and the make-out parties, and the agonies of embarrassment to be found in the aisles of Meijer.   For the first time, I saw my life as being more about what I thought about things rather than what everyone in town thought.  Don’t get me wrong, I was your typical almost teenage girl.  I was just as conscious of what people thought as anyone.  But now I knew that the world was full of people, all with different ways of looking at things.

Now that I see my list, I realize that my son is very unlikely to experience most of these particular landmarks within the next year.  And those he does experience, I don’t want to hear about.  Feeling ill again….  Anyway, I guess his landmarks will be different ones.

But even more than this, my list makes me realize that, other than the try-on-bra-over-the-clothes thing, my mom was really something.  She seemed to recognize my rites of passage and, for the most part, she stood back and let me go through them as I should – on my own two feet.  Can I do this with my kids?  I don’t know.  I can look to her example and try.

My mom also taught me that sometimes a bloody mary doesn’t hurt.


Ode To Summer


I write this Ode to Summer as I wonder where it went.
The kids head back to school soon, yet I don’t know how it was spent!

‘Course there was some beach time, and a mountain visit, too,
And hanging at the pool, and “We’re bored!  What can we do?”

A large part spent on softball, oft many games a day,
And also lots of baseball, with All-Stars dressed in grey.

Instead of being scheduled, we’ve stayed up late at night,
And then, of course, we slept in late, and rising was a fight.

And then we all were crabby, both the kids and me,
And Scott came home and wondered “What can the problem be?”

He still worked, ‘near every day, and missed most o’ the fun,
And yet he came home to find that WE were grumpy when day was done.

The kids and I, we really see the familiarity and contempt thing,
And I, myself, have often found the idea of running away tempting!

You see, they fight, my kids, they do!  For all the live long day,
And really, they don’t listen to a single word I say!

“Pick up your clothes, go brush your teeth, please leave your sib alone!”
Clothes on the floor, teeth nearly green, and fighting danger zone!

I love my kids, I really do!  But sometimes I just think
I can’t make it through the day with them without a good stiff drink!

So Summer, I am happy to see your tail end go!
Off to school with the kids!  Back to the status quo!

Summer, I won’t miss ya’, with your fighting and malaise,
I won’t miss us all being home and all those cranky days!

Good riddance to you and to my kids, who really chap my hide.
I will not miss them nor will I the sass I can’t abide.

They will head off to school and their friends they haven’t seen,
And maybe I will find the time to get my house all clean.

And catch up on the laundry — I let it go for weeks.
‘Cuz we were all out having fun, with sun upon our cheeks.

I guess we did have some good times, now that I really think.
We laughed and talked, and there were times when we were all in sync.

We played some games, we sang some songs.  It really was a blast!
Oh, I love my kids so very much!  Why can’t the summer last?


Something Borrowed, Something Blue


The Lady In Red